#bodiesI’d rather my daughter smoke weed than read Seventeen

56 comments | April 2nd, 2013


(submitted by seth@OOC) We originally posted this in May of 2011.  While the specificity of Ann's hypocricy has since passed, we think the breadth of Seventeen's hypocrisy continues.  Be who you are - but don't pretend to be something else. Our daughter's a year older...but nothing has changed enough to cause us to change our title, premise, nor belief. (5.3.12. and again on 4.2.13) This is Ann Shoket, Seventeen magazine's editor.  I hear she's very nice. But I also think this picture, which is (note: it was) her twitter profile pic, is a ridunkulous display of hypocrisy and moral convenience.  I don't think you get to bitchslap the pressure to be perfect in a profile pic AT THE SAME TIME you're yelling "PERFECT HAIR all summer" on your magazine's cover, and promoting a "bonus mag" that screams: "BODY", "Makeover"; Flat Abs!  A great butt!  Amazing legs! Yummy Recipes!".  That's.  Just.  Not.  Cool. Maybe it's just me, but you just shouldn't get to position yourself as part of the solution when you're still an on-going part of the problem. And Seventeen's a part of the problem.  In my opinion, they're a big part of ...

#thecumulativeeffectDoes Arianna Huffington Hate Women?

2 comments | March 14th, 2013


(by Feel More Better) She probably doesn't.  And maybe it's just us, but we think if, as Arianna does, you champion women's rights on the one-hand maybe you shouldn't oversee a business that objectifies, sexualizes and stereotypes women routinely on the other. Whether doing so is moral convenience, straight-up hypocrisy, or a business-decision that ignores its social consequences...at a minimum it's inconsistent and talking out of both sides of your mouth. And so we started this petition to ask Arianna Huffington to consider the disconnect between what she says and what her eponymous media empire does. We figured that a leader like Arianna must not realize how routine and rampant the denigration is.  She's busy, after all and maybe she doesn't have time to read the Huffington Post. Surely, we thought, being made aware of the problem she'd see it as an opportunity to do right, and to lead.  The evidence of the objectification is so clear, so obvious, so plain to see over and over so many times each day...how could she do nothing? But we didn't just start a petition, we emailed her.  And you know what, she emailed back in about ...

#thecumulativeeffectThe Hypocrisy of Arianna Huffington

1 response | March 7th, 2013

Screen Shot 2013-03-07 at 9.56.08 AM

Here are 10 headlines (and a screen shot on the left) from the front page of Huffington Post as I type. You decide if 1 by 1 or as a whole they objectify women. Or, maybe you think they help move women forward in a society that still keeps them back (whether by design or default).  We have our opinion here, and it's that Arianna is being wildly hypocritical, championing women's issues and social justice on the one hand, and overseeing a business that uses objectification and sexualization as page-bait, as regularly and consistently and in as much quantity as The Huffington Post does. Obviously we can all do and think whatever we want.  Arianna has a business to run.  But it seems to us it's nothing short of wildly hypocritical to hold yourself up as a fighter against wrongs when you keep-on perpetuating the wrongs you say you're fighting against. Here are those 10: Sweaty Selena PHOTO: Tina Fey's Swimsuit Nightmare Kate For Playboy Dita's 3D Dress "Teen Mom" Sex Tape Allison's Hot Workout Pants Renee Looks Different Naomi Watts Nearly Flashes All What Liking Boobs Could Mean LOOK: Katniss Everdeen Dons Jaw-Dropping Gown For 50 more ...

#WTF?!?50 Huffington Post Headlines

3 comments | February 8th, 2013

Here's 50 Huffington Post headlines from the past 5 days. If you think they're objectifying and sexualizing women, sign our petition (here) and let Arianna know.  If you don't, let us know in the comments or on twitter @FeelMoreBetter. 50 Huffington Post Headlines in 5 Days. 1.  Khloe Kardashian: My Vagina Smells Like Roses 2.  PHOTOS: When a Good Dress goes VERY Sexy 3.  What Women Should Never Say to Guys During Super Bowl 4.  This Supermodel STILL Looks Amazing 5.  NSFW: Former Beauty Queen Flashes Her Headlights 6.  Wardrobe Malfunctions 7.  More Wardrobe Malfunctions 8.  Miley's Midriff 9.   Rachel's Tiny Shorts 10.  Juliane's Risky Dress 11.  Jessica's Skin Tight Dress 12.  J-Law Goes Low Cut 13.  Keira Talks Knickers 14.  Denise's Skinny Pics 15.  PHOTOS: Mischa Barton Leaves Her Bra At Home 16.  Miley Shows Too Much Skin 17.  Miranda's Lingerie Photoshoot 18.  Kerry Without Make-up 19.  Stars Who Showed Too Much 20.  Jennifer's Jumpsuit 21.  Best & Worst Beauty 22.  WATCH: 8 Sexist Super Bowl Ads We'll Never Forget 23.  'Girls' Star Debuts Boob Window Dress 24.  LOOK: Users of Gay Hookup App Under Fire for Bizarre Photo Trend 25.  PHOTOS: Super Bowl Eye Candy 26.  PHOTOS: It's Burberry and Strippers For Harry Styles 27.   WATCH: What ...

#lifestagesSix and Sexy

2 comments | October 8th, 2012

6 and sexy

(by Kate Gould)

Last Tuesday I decided I'd count the number of times I saw pictures of women doing sexy wherever I happened to see them. Wandering round the supermarket trying to find something for dinner that my pet rats would like, standing at the bus stop, flicking through magazines at the dentist, buying stuff online I don't need with money I don't have, walking to the pet shop to buy rat treats, and sitting in the bath reading the pile of Sunday supplements stacked by the loo, I counted 102 such images, each barely distinguishable from the next but all pouting and posing. Admittedly, waiting over an hour at the dentist and topping up the bath water to stop it going cold for two hours, I spent more time than I usually would looking through magazines in a day, but still, all those women are out there along with the products they're selling.

Despite how many we see in a day, these sexualised and sexist images of women are almost socially invisible. Adverts that depict women as dislocated body parts, corpses, objects, drug addicts, victims of gang ...

#lifestagesHe Lied About Me

4 comments | September 25th, 2012

chestist sad

(by "Breezy", a 21 yo Chestist)

I think we can all agree, sometimes some people suck.  This story is one of those times:

A good friend of mine lied to his friends and the guy I've been dating about sleeping with me. I just want to know why. I don't understand. It really, really hurts me, and it makes me feel sick, used, and betrayed. {end story}

This ever happen to you...where someone, let alone a good friend, made up a story about you...somethingthat was so false and hurtful and left you wondering wny and WTF?  What happened?  How;d you deal with it?  How'd you get past it - or haven't you?

If you haven't, we say let it go.  it's doing nothing good for you.  But either way, share your story here, won't you?


#bodiesWhere’s the Outrage?

10 comments | September 24th, 2012

WTF Burst

(by FMB)

We'll admit we don't get why and where popular media chooses to focus its - and our - attention, sometimes. 

Sometimes we're outraged by the abscence of outrage in our society.  Let's all talk about Lady Gaga's weight, Amy Poehler's divorce, or Amanda Bynes' troubles , but not these #s, and the massive, epidemic crisis of confidence affecting girls.  The status quo just isn't acceptable anymore.

7 out of 10 girls 8-17 believe they aren't good enough or don't measure up in some way (We're wondering good enough for what and measure up to what or whom?)

62% of all girls feel insecure about themselves (this is a massive crisis of confidence that does and will have serious ripple effects)

57% have a mother who criticizes her own looks (hey mom, think what you will - but stop hating on yourself in front of the kids)

What do you think?  Surprised by any?  What can we do to put the focus where it needs to be (and not on Ryan's abs), and why aren't we talking about this more?.




( data from Real Girls Real Pressure, a National Report on the State ...

#bodiesI Am Not My Stereotype

1 response | September 6th, 2012

50s chestist

(story submmitted anonymously, by a Chestist)

We're probably all guilty of having judged a book or two by its cover.  Feels a lot different when we're the book though.  Here's how she feels:

I have bleach blonde hair, big boobs, and apparently a decent ass. That doesn't make me stupid or shallow. It doesn't mean my life is perfect or that I am happier than anyone else. I have interest and issues too. I'm so sick of people taking one look at me and deciding I'm some sort of Barbie doll. {end story}

You ever been a victim of stereotyping?  When, how, why?  You ever been a stereotyper (most of us have)?  When, how, why?   Here's the thing about stereoptypes, they suck.  You can quote us on that.

A Woman Should…

19 comments | August 29th, 2012


(Submitted by Shelby, a 22 yo Chestist)

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... > enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own, even if she never wants to or needs to... > A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... something perfect to wear if the employer, or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour... > A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... > a youth she's content to leave behind.... > A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... a past juicy enough that she's looking forward to retelling it in her old age.... > A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra... > A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... > one friend who always makes her laugh... and one who lets her cry... > A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... > a good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family... > A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ... > eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, and a recipe for a meal, that will make her ...

#thecumulativeeffectThanks for the Rape Epiphany, Rep. Akin

46 comments | August 20th, 2012


(by Mir from WouldaShoulda)

Unless you're living under a rock (or without Internet; same thing), you likely know that yesterday Rep. Todd Akin (R-Missouri) managed to stick his foot pretty far down his own throat. So far, in fact, that he asserted that when a woman is a victim of a "legitimate rape," she can't get pregnant because her body can "shut things down." (If you somehow missed the kerfluffle, you can read about it here.)

This spawned an entire day of alternating political jokes and outrage... blogs, Facebook, and Twitter all lit up with commentary as people of all political persuasions were able to unite behind a single idea, for once. Sure, that idea was pretty much "this Akin guy is a moron," but still. My friends were cracking jokes about their "magical vaginas" and lists of "other things my body can shut down" and such were popping up more quickly than I could neglect my work and read them all. My favorite resultant article was this one on Jezebel, just in case you're interested in figuring out what sort of rape you may be facing.

I have ...

#lifestagesTTYL, BFF

21 comments | August 13th, 2012

cloudy talk burst

(by Mir from WouldaShoulda)

As a child---and perhaps even more so, as a teenager---I was jealous of my friends who lived in neighborhoods where they could walk to other friends' houses. We lived kind of out in the sticks, and if I was to hang out in proximity to another kid my own age, I would need a ride. And it's not that I never got to go to other people's houses, but it wasn't nearly as frequent as I wished. Basically I wanted to be able to access my friends any time I felt like it, a.k.a., always.

The result of this sad state of affairs was twofold: First, during school (and classes where talking was prohibited, or the desired friends were in different classes) I wrote notes. Lots and lots of notes. The beauty of a note was that if you did it right, it looked like you were hard at work on whatever you were supposed to be doing, and then you could either chuck it at your intended recipient when the teacher's back was turned (if she was in your class) or pass it ...


59 comments | August 6th, 2012


(by Mir)

Pardon me while I settle myself down on my porch and shake my cane at passersby. All young whippersnappers should probably steer clear of me for their own safety. It's not that I mean to be cranky, it's that I'm suddenly feeling quite old and fed up with today's award-based messages to our kids.

There's no shortage of stories about the travesty that is the American need for everyone to be a winner. Participate in a sport? Get a trophy! Participate in a contest? Get a ribbon! Participate in some other random thing? Here's your certificate of participation! No one is special when everyone is. We've spoon-fed our kids the need to "get" something every single time they bother to get out of bed. And then we wonder why they feel unfulfilled, unmotivated, or generally directionless.

None of this is news, of course. And I have tried, with my own kids, to do the "right" things: praise their efforts, but not too much; reward for actual accomplishments, but not feel the need to reward everything; extoll the virtues of intangibles like teamwork and creativity and persistence rather than whether ...

#thecumulativeeffectHannah Montana on Body Image

4 comments | July 29th, 2012


 (by Abbie, a 17 yo Chestist)

"Nobody's perfect." - Hannah Montana


Nobody (no body) is perfect...that's a radical thought. You may "know" it already, but do you really KNOW it? And if not, it's time to ask yourself the following: In what universe does Hannah Montana know something I don't??? {end story}



#thecumulativeeffect1 Reason We Shouldn’t Compare

14 comments | July 18th, 2012

compared to what

(OOC via CNN)

Keeping up with the Joneses has been part of the American way since at least the 50s.  We compare oursleves to what they havem he, has, she has almost incessantly and certainly inextricably.  There was less to compare ourselves to, fewer data points and inputs and our social circles were limited to who we knew in the physical world, pre facebook et al.  But now, oh girl.  from the CNN report:

"Because of social networks, though, the field of competition has expanded dramatically. Now you're competing with the best pictures and the ebullient status updates of every girl you know. 'It's as if somewhere along the line, Facebook became the encyclopedia of beauty and status and comparisons.'"

If we've got a minute to spare we might just check out what's up on FB (or tw, or whatever).  And BANG BOOM ZIP, all of a sudden we're confronted with what she did, he did, she has, the party we missed and weren't invited to, the dinner that those guys had together, the fun, the laughter, the the the the...everything we weren;t ...

#thecumulativeeffectSix and Sexy?

7 comments | July 16th, 2012

WTF Burst

(via MSNBC)

Are we ~ as a culture ~ ready to admit we've got a problem, are creating a problem, and need to address a whole mess of problems?  From the article below,  Most girls as young as 6 are already beginning to think of themselves as sex objects."  "Most."  "as young as six".  "Sex objects."  Come on, really?  WTF? 

By Jennifer Abbas LiveScience

Most girls as young as 6 are already beginning to think of themselves as sex objects, according to a new study of elementary school-age kids in the Midwest.

Researchers have shown in the past that women and teens think of themselves in sexually objectified terms, but the new study is the first to identify self-sexualization in young girls. The study, published online July 6 in the journal Sex Roles, also ...