#lifestagesHer Diagnosis: Bipolar Disorder

5 comments | November 16th, 2011

chestist threads

(story submitted by Euna, A Chestist)

This is one of those stories that reminds us all that no matter how dark today, tomorrow's always around the corner.  Let's get right into this,  sent us some months back by Euna, a chestist and one of you:

When I was 11, I started cutting. Stupid, I know.

When people think of a cutter they see an emo kid listening to The Cure slicing into their wrists saying, "No one understands me!" For me, I was just a normal kid. I realized, with a pair of scissors, how amazing the blood looked as it trailed down my finger. It was an accident at first, but I continued to do it. I became obsessed with the pain, because it filled some infinitesimal hole I felt had burrowed it's way deep into my heart.

By the time I was 13, I had multiple scars on my arms and legs. I fell into rapid depressions that would last for days at a time, and I hardly ever went to school. My teenage years were filled with these depressions, as well as periods of ...

The Secret to Madonna’s success.

comment | November 15th, 2011

Via HealthyIsTheNewSkinny.com.  http://su.pr/9oJipc.

#lifestagesGET MAD

55 comments | November 15th, 2011

green eyed

(story by Mir from Woulda Coulda Shoulda)

So I told you a while ago that I took my daughter to see The Vagina Monologues, and even though it was slightly uncomfortable, I thought it was important. When we saw it back in February, I was totally gung-ho about auditioning for the show for next year, but life tends to get in the way, you know? Auditions are coming up soon. I'd thought (more than once) that I really just don't have time to take this on, right now.

But I have a daughter. I have a teenage daughter and she adores me one minute and hates me the next. She's looking to me for guidance and pushing me away, and despite how busy I've been, and how I keep thinking that maybe next year I'll be less busy, a nagging thought in the back of my head has said "Do it now."

Maybe it's related, maybe it's not, but yesterday my daughter was subjected to sexual harassment at school. Yesterday my 13-year-old was SEXUALLY HARASSED at her MIDDLE SCHOOL. Take a moment with that, if you ...

Is Natural Beauty A Lost Art?

comment | November 14th, 2011


#lifestagesEffing Rumors

3 comments | November 14th, 2011

mean girls

(story submitted by Kylan, a Chestist)

Message Body:

When I was 14 years old, my best friend decided to spread rumors around my whole school about me. Saying I had slept with some guy I just met, got pregnant, then aborted the baby. I did NONE of those things.

But the school believed the rumors, I guess lies were more fun then the truth. Girls we yelling at me, punching me, spitting on me, calling me names.. boys where sexually harrasing me, pushing me into walls, calling me names. I got really depressed with no friends and the school hating me. I grew suicidal.

Then I started talking to a counselor and got help. I was a victim of girl on girl meanness, and I'm not the only one. But I am one who survived it. And i say that lightly. Although I am ok now, I remember what state I was in. Life's tuff for everyone, no girl or guy has to make it tougher for anyone. No one deserves it. never will.  {end story.}  

Remember that old "sticks and stones may break my bones but words ...

#lifestagesIt Sucks Growing Up

5 comments | November 12th, 2011

50s chestist

(submitted anonymously, by a Chestist)

There's a song that sings "the first days are the hardest part."  Unfortunately, for a lot of us, the first days can last all the way through High School.  They did for her:

It sucks growing up. It sucks even more when you're a girl who *gasp* dared to like learning and had the nerve to be intelligent. That was me through high school. Shunned because I actually use my brain and enjoy it. I have never been so relieved as when I got to college and found other people like me.  {end story}

Were school days hard for you; were you one of the cool kids; or did you just float through as if on a lazy river? 

How do you think those days influenced who you are now, if at all? 

Any advice to share with those going through it (whatever it is) now?  Go on, break out that yearbook, let's revisit the past, and #discuss.  XO


#bodiesIs Fat a Disease?

7 comments | November 12th, 2011

dude, wtf

(story submitted anonymously, by a Chestist)

I'm so frustrated!

I hate that there are so many people, who like me, are overweight. And so many people, not like me but just like me, who are underweight. Obese. Fat. Underweight. Skinny. A disease. Imagine defining the way someone looks as a disease.

Imagine your respected doctor or health professional telling you your appearance is a disease. How is that legal? Why do we allow that?

My diet might be a problem. My activity might be a problem. Maybe I'm not doing healthy things, maybe I have an eating disorder, but the way I look is not the actual issue. The issue is that my body image is terrible because airbrushed magazines give other people and myself unreasonable goals and doctors like you validate them by telling me I look like a disease and that's the problem.  {end story.}

You ever had a doctor - or some professional - say something to you where you were all WTF?!  When?  What'd you do or say back? 

Love & SexMarried to a Meth Addict

41 comments | November 11th, 2011

chestist sad

(story submitted anonymously, by a 22 yo Chestist)

So our first reaction as we read this, sent to us by one of you, was "wow.  how could she not know!?"  Then we realized we were judging and that love can blind us to even the most obvious of things.  Here's her story: I've been married with my husband for 3 years now. When i met him he was addicted to Crystal meth and weed. I am currently on my last year of college and i will be graduating with a bachelors in Criminal Justice.

When i met him and he told me about his addictions i told him that i could not be in a relationship with someone who does drugs because of my future career and simply because you cant have a family and live a normal life like that. He said he really liked me and that he was willing to quit, and that he had been looking for a reason to stop,and that i would be the reason he would stop.

So, i decided to give him a chance we started dating and everything was ...

Norway Proposes Warning Labels on Photoshopped Ads

comment | November 11th, 2011


Love & SexChemistry

comment | November 10th, 2011


(This story originally appeared on Clarisse Thorn: Pro-Sex Outreach, Open-Minded Feminism.)

It's a long story and a short one, but I guess all of them are.

I'm 27. It's about that age: A lot of my compatriots are getting married lately -- most monogamously, some to a primary polyamorous partner. I myself have a stack of relationships in my past. Some were monogamous, some polyamorous. Some have been on-and-off, some short-term, some long-term (5 or 6 years was the longest). Lately I've been processing some tough questions about polyamory, but I'd like to stick with it.

And I've been thinking a lot about what I want in a primary polyamorous partner. The kind of guy I could marry. I wonder if I'll ever get to that point. I wonder if I'd know him if I saw him.  

* *

I met Mr. Ambition at one of the aforementioned weddings. Several people recommended that I talk to him, and we liked each other right away. Mutual friends used words like "zealot" to describe him; let's just say he's got an intense history of dedicated activism. Charisma, integrity, and ...

Love & SexDon’t Call Me A Party Girl

5 comments | November 10th, 2011

party girl

(story submitted by 20SomethingWannabe, a Chestist)

The term "party girl" is basically the new socially acceptable way to say drunken slut.

It sounds casual and colloquial, but make no mistake, this is now a derogatory character description. But what exactly is a party girl? Is a party girl someone that goes out with their friends? Is a party girl the girl that becomes the sloppy mess falling down at the club? Is a party girl the girl that goes out to look for a hook up? Or can the party girl just be a girl who doesn't want to sit at home on the weekends?

Listen, all of the above can describe any girl. Some girls are just better about keeping their activities surreptitious. A guy is basically asking to figure out whether or not he will be able to fuck you the same night that he meets you.

But just because you go out doesn't mean that you are a "party girl" in the inebriated whore way. I hate it when people ask me "are you a party girl?" Do you mean do I like to be social? Or do ...

#bodiesThe Vagina is Becoming Big Business

5 comments | November 10th, 2011

no one would know

This article's a bit old, a month or so, but we've been busy.  It's so good, we're just reprinting it here.  You can find the original here.

By MAE ANDERSON, AP Retail Writer

NEW YORK (AP) — Celebrities are gabbing about it openly. A growing number of grooming products cater to it. And a recent TV commercial hails it as "the cradle of life" and "the center of civilization."

The vagina is becoming big business.

A generation that grew up with more graphic language and sexual images in the media is forgoing the decades-old practice of tiptoeing around female genitalia in favor of more open dialogue about it. To reach digital-age 20- and 30-somethings, who also have shortened attention spans, marketers are using ads that are edgier, more frank and sometimes downright shocking.

"Gen Y people are more relaxed about their bodies, so there's more attention to products that people would have been embarrassed to talk about before," says Deborah Mitchell, executive director for the Center for Brand and Product Management at the University of Wisconsin School of Business. "It's part of this trend of women saying, 'Hey, we're not ...

#thecumulativeeffectKTLA News Anchor Loses it On Concerned Dad

comment | November 9th, 2011


Happy (Gender) Meals, @McDonald’s

comment | November 9th, 2011

Via BitchMagazine.com http://su.pr/15xKVM

#bodies…A Stupid Waste of Time

17 comments | November 9th, 2011

stupid waste

(By OOC and via TheGirlRevolution.com)

So you might have heard about The Self-Esteem Act we've proposed, requiring "Truth in Advertising" labeling be attached to any ad or editorial that meaningfully changes the human form through digital manipulation, like photoshopping.  It's our hope that the Act might help contribute to stemming the epidemic cirsis of confidence affecting girls and women.  Not everyone agrees with us.

We bumped into the story below (reposted here with the author's permission) at TheGirlRevolution.com.  We love their site, their vision and mission, and everything they're trying to do.  We also love that they disagree with us so openly and productively and allowed us to disagree with them, equally. 

A large part of what we're hoping to accomplish with and through The Self-Esteem Act is to help mainstream a conversation about the aforementioned epidemic  - because no matter what the right answers are, they'll happen faster and with greater scale if the problems come to be understood and recognized at a mainstream level. Dissent (productive dissent) helps do this. 

And, we don't pretent to suggest that the act is the final answer or ...